What is this?
by ilovethefray
Summary: what happens when grimmjaw is forced to taste-test orihimes food? click to find out! one-shot.


"Don't you like the way I cook Grimmjaw?" Orihime asked with hope in her eyes.

"No bitch, your shit is disgusting. I still don't know why Aizen said you could cook for him and why I have to be the taste tester!"

"Maybe its because he trust you so much ?"She said trying to sooth his nerves.

"Huh, yea right! Now your really delusional. Now give me the next meal will ya."Grimmjaw said with a hint of annoyance.

"Oh yea!" Orihime rushed to the kitchen and took a huge plate out of the oven. It had nacho chips covered in cheese and oysters outlining the plate's design. There were grapes popped above the cheese and crumbs of cornbread sprinkled on the top.

Grimmjaw stared at this and all his patience left the room.

"You...you thing! What do you call this...this contraction of yours, **Trash from the Garbage Disposal**?"he asked mocking her food.

"Actually, its called **Fruity Nachos from the Cajun Sea**!" Orihime said-not even noticing the comment that she had just received. She could really be dense sometimes.

Grimmjaw blinked his eyes in a scared manner. Was he really going to have to eat that? He may have been the sixth espada but he would surrender his pride any time if it meant not eating this. There was no way in hell he would even touch this.

"Grimmjaw honey,what are you thinking right now? You haven't touched your food yet. Is there something wrong with it?"Orihime said looking like she would pounce all over Grimmjaw if he didn't dig into her delicious meal.

"Are you fucking serious? Of course there's something wrong with it. It looks like you pulled it out your ass!"Grimmjaw said with his anger raising to unimaginable threw the table across the room and then changed into his panther form. He then started clawing into the first piece of furniture he saw. He did this for at least ten minutes with Orihime just staring at him with an awe stricken face. When he finished, he turned back to his human form and look at Orihime. There was an awkward silence in the air for a few seconds until Grimmjaw finally spoke.

"Whats for desert?"He asked in a cool, calm, and collected voice as if what just happend never happened.

Orihime, shocked but not disappointed, put her all-around smile on and went back to the kitchen and pulled out something special from the freezer.

"I think you'll really like these. We call them chocolates down on earth. Their really good."She said looking at Grimmjaw waiting for him to try one.

Grimmjaw picked up a piece and studied it like an archaeologist would study a fossil. It was about the size of a Hershey bar and it had lumps in it so he assumed they were almonds. It looked normal for a change so he took a chance and ate it.

"Not that bad for a freak."Grimmjaw said swallowing the last of it.

Orihime smiled. "I knew you would like them. Chocolate makes everyone happy!" But Grimmjaw wasn't there. Orihime looked around the room to see Grimmjaw on the floor cursing everything he could think of. He turned his head towards Orihime. His eyes glared darts at her.

"What did you do!" He yelled, "My tongue is practically fried!"

Orihime just stared at him with an amused face. She wasn't planning on answering that question.

"So you didn't like them? Well that's all you had to say." Orihime said oblivious to the fact that Grimmjaw was throwing up blood. To her, it was just a big dramatic scene that Grimmjaw put on for attention. She had other things to worry about; like what she had done wrong that would make Grimmjaw not like her chocolates. Then the problem hit her like a bulldozer hits a building.

"Oh now I got it. I put to much Habenaro peppers in it this time that's why you don't like them."She said to Grimmjaw. "I promise next time I'll only put two of them in there okay?"

At this time Grimmjaw was sweating gallons and his hair was stuck to his face. His eyes were so sharp they could pierce you in one look by themselves. His lips were slightly parted and he was panting heavily trying to recover from his "dramatic scene". He muttered these three words before he passed out:

"Damn you bitch!"


End file.
